When Siblings Won't Share: A Montessori Take

Sharing isn't a virtue you can lecture into a child. It's a skill that grows from feeling safe about having enough. Montessori approaches sharing by protecting the child's work first.

If one child is using an activity, they get to finish it. The other child waits, or chooses something else. Many parents find that 'you can have it when they're done' causes less fighting than 'you have to share now,' because it respects both children.

Have two of some things, especially for very close-in-age siblings. Two brooms, two stools, two of the most-loved activity. Not everything, but enough that the daily friction drops.

Don't force the apology. A forced 'sorry' teaches nothing except that words get you out of trouble. Model the repair instead, and let the real apology come later, when it's real.

Watch for the underlying need. A lot of sharing fights are actually 'I want your attention' fights. Ten minutes of focused time with the grabbing child often fixes the grabbing.

Keep the environment fair. Low shelves both can reach. Chores both can do. A home where both children belong and both can act has fewer fights over stuff.